Essays on how women live, change, and become.
By Jean McAulay
I write about the quiet shifts that reshape women's lives—the moments when the story we told ourselves starts to feel like it belongs to someone else. These essays are observations, not instructions. Thinking out loud. There are no five-step plans here.
Instead, I try to notice what sits just beneath the surface: the pull between independence and connection, the weight of reinvention, the small recognitions that accumulate into something larger.
If you've ever felt like you're in the middle of becoming someone you don't quite know yet, and are excited about the possibilities, you might find a place here that feels right. Somewhere to pause, observe and think about who you're in the process of becoming.
At a poetry workshop recently we were instructed to write "I don't know," at the top of our spiral notebooks and just start writing. It turns out I don't know so very many, many things. But pondering them told me something about what was occupying my thoughts, and maybe even what deserved more or less of my attention.
Read the essayBack in middle school we ended romantic relationships awkwardly and often through a third period. It’s unfortunate we didn’t practice having those tough conversations when we were young. Unlike acne and braces, the need to end relationships of all kinds with clarity and kindness persists well into adulthood.
ReadTurns out making friends as an adult is a big lift. Research shows 50 hours is just a start. It takes 300 to make a really close friend. But worth it, right?
ReadHow loss, setbacks, disappointments, and challenges can actually lead to meaningful growth and even personal reinvention. That's what happened to Andrea when her entire house burned to the ground.
ReadA series of essays exploring the transitions, recognitions, and quiet reckonings that mark the middle chapters of a woman's life. Each piece stands alone, but together they trace something larger—a way of looking at what changes and what remains.
Explore What FollowsForthcoming
A novel, April 2027
A story about the life that emerges when the one you expected falls away. About what we leave behind and what we carry forward. About the person you become when you finally stop trying to be the person you thought you should be.
Learn moreIf you'd like to read what comes next—new essays, occasional reflections, and thoughts on the writing life—you can subscribe here.
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